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During the years we ladies once in our lifetimes at least have gone through some kind of breakup. Whether he’s a boyfriend or a husband they hurt just the same. The key to getting over a breakup is not in just 1 factor but in many. I am a woman who has survived divorce and heartbreak and came out stronger than ever.
I’m always giving advice to all my girls on how to deal, cope and be strong and get over the situation the fastest way possible. Today I’m going to give you the most important steps to take when you have just gotten your heart broken or have decided to leave a toxic relationship that seems to not be going anywhere. The problem is we females like routine and hate change and sometimes are even afraid of the idea of starting over again. It’s not easy when you have spent a year or 2 with someone getting to know them and then having to do it all over again.
Divorce is even harder some of you will stick around in a situation that is completely destructive because of finances or kids or just thinking how can I do this on my own. The idea of being a single parent is scary especially if you have a weak support system. But let me tell you that you always have options and leaving a toxic relationship is better for you than staying in one. It will not be easy but we humans with time always forget and adjust to any situation.
Here are 5 Rules to Follow when going through a breakup.
Stay around your support system
This is not the time to be sitting in your bed with your tissue box crying your eyes out. When you do that it doesn’t get better and you risk slumping into depression and letting the other win. Men generally when they go through a breakup they go out with all their boys and party and drink and later on mourn the relationship. It generally takes about 3 weeks to hit them. By then they are over there little party binge and feel alone. While we females are capable of doing both. We can surround ourselves with friends mourn the relationship and go out and have a great time and deal with the breakup while its happening.
Your friends can help you more then you think. They are the ones to boost your confidence and encourage you to move on. Go Visit your family. Surrounding yourself with people who love you and support you unconditionally is a really good healing mechanism.
Time to Hit the Block Button.
The worst thing you can do is stalk him on social media. I believe once the relationship has ended its time for the block button. However, you block yourself from seeing him but let him decide to block you. Don’t follow him on Insta facebook or snapchat. I would suggest that you go out have fun with your girls and post lots of pics of you just being happy and believe me, he will wonder why your not sitting there crying about him and it will make him agitated.
Do avoid invitations to a social gathering where you know he will be there. Avoid running into him by all means. The point is you want to forget not keep having him pop up in front of you and reminding you of that dreadful breakup. Guys also move on faster you might see him with someone else and have a blown out confrontation where you will somehow embarrass yourself.
Working out is so important when going through a breakup. It releases lots of negative energy and frustration it also sends happy endorphins and you will feel much better . Working out let’s you work on yourself by getting in shape by regaining your confidence. It’s also a time filler so that you are filling up your schedule and your avoiding being alone.
Dont Shit Talk
I would avoid speaking about him as much as possible. The more you shit talk about your ex , the more it makes you look like you are desperate and can’t get over him. Talk about how well your doing and whats new in your life or even travel plans but avoid talking about him. Let’s face it everything gets back to him one way or another. Men can be vicious and hit back below the belt. At this point, you are not ready to hear his shit talk about you. If someone asks you about your breakup, Its best to just say “I believe it was for the best, Things were just not working anymore”. leave it at that.
Don’t Post Sad Stuff On Social Media
I cant tell you how many time I tell my girlfriends to not post that breakup quote or not share that breakup song. Ladies the whole world doesn’t need to know about your breakup. One thing I hate is the pitty. Not only will people pity you but they will also say “oh look poor thing she got dumped.” I believe no acknowledgment of the breakup is the best way to also show him that you are not affected by him and you are just doing just fine without him.
Follow these points and I guarantee you will heal much faster and come out of your breakup stronger than ever. And if you want your ex back, believe me, him seeing that you are better and happy will make him reach out somehow. But in my opinion, if a glass breaks once you can never put it back together again like it was. MOVE ON !